• Please do not discuss honorariums with me via email, in person, via text, or on the phone. 
• Honorariums are nonnegotiable, please don’t ask.
• Please place honorariums in an unsealed envelope in an obvious location where we meet, whether in private or in public. You don’t not need to point this out to me or discuss it with me verbally in any way.
• Also, please do not discuss anything explicit with me via email or phone as well, I will discontinue communicaiton immediately.  This includes any and all acronyms sometimes used online–I don’t know any of them anyway. 😉 Keep emails close to what you would say to a business associate when setting up a meeting and expect me to do the same.
• However, please take a moment to properly introduce yourself to me when first emailing me. Emails with little to no info are screened more heavily and one line emails are deleted.
• Having the financial means to book does not guarantee booking.
• No late night phone calls, texts, or commencement of appointments. Please do not text me on nights and weekends, keeping all texts to during the weekday only if you have my cell. Feel free to email me anytime.
• Good hygiene is expected.  Please be weight appropriate for your height.  Ages 30-65 only please.
• Kindness, good manners, behavior like that of a gentleman, and respect is expected.
• Please be respectful of my time and effort, avoiding cancellations at all costs and I will do the same. It is very rare that I ever cancel a meeting. If you have to cancel within 24 hours of our booked time, I now ask for a 50% fee to be paid at the time of cancellation. My time, like yours, is very valuable. Please also request all bookings with at least 24 hours advanced notice.
• Serious inquiries only.